Thursday, March 23, 2006

The Ford tried to bring The Fury last night, but the site was down when The Ford showed up. And so, today, The Ford feels nothing but the pain of Fury past....

There's Fury for Alfonso Soriano, who had the seemingly Hamletian dilemma of 2B, or not 2B...
For what it's worth, I sorta understood his point, especially since he's a solid second baseman (offensively, if not defensively), but a poor left fielder (both offensively and defensively). Especially considering the Nationals (proving you don't need an owner to qualify as Major League Baseball's most annoying franchise) never asked his opinion.
Of course, he'd have been stupid to sit out, 'cause, really, only two things come out of his playing in left field:
1.) He's fantastic, and the club keeps him there, and he can continue playing there as he gets more used to it, or sign with another team next season, somewhere where he can play second base.
2.) He's horrible, and the club moves him back to second base, and they never, ever make that mistake again, and he signs somewhere else next year to play second base.

There's Fury for the stupidity of the Yankees, sueing a hat designer/fan Mike Moorby over a possible copyright infringement case. Which seems stupid. There's probably 20 defenses here, The Ford would think. But this dude has to spend his money fighting the good fight against the Yanks. (Did The Ford say the Nats were the most annoying. He blogged too soon, it appears.)

There's Fury on behalf of Iowa State's former basketball coach Wayne Morgan, who didn't even get the chance to fully finish out his first recruiting class. What The Ford has learned from Iowa State: If you know you're on a short least, it's better to go out like Larry Eustachy than like Coach Morgan.

There's Fury at The Ford for apprently getting lazy and not going beyond's shores for a full two days. Not to mention Fury at The Ford for a stunning lack of hot women over the past week. Or is that Fury for the overabundance of hot women in the weeks before that. Fellas, ask the ladies. Ladies, ask the fellas. Either way, it's well-deserved fury, to be sure.

There's Fury that the finest night of sleep The Ford's gotten in two months was accomplished soley by binge-drinking his way through the better part of two hours at The Official Bar, then heading home, taking a 30-minute warm shower, and then climbing straight into bed. And all so The Ford could show up 2 hours early for work.

Finally, The Ford's full of The Fury at his brackets. No, not the ones he filled out for that little get-together the NCAA's having; The Ford knew he was toast in that before it started.
No, The Ford's putting on a poor showing in his NBA dance team bracket.
The Ford got only five of the Easy Eight correct, a shockingly poor showing, considering he started picking when only 18 teams or so remained. The Ford blames the setup, as well as Sac-town's finest's gutty performance. (Or is that a "chesty" performance, after observing the sweatermeat the Kings team is packing? Who shoots their team photo in what appears to be a strip club. Oh, wait, the team's owned by the Maloof Brothers? Never mind.)
Still, The Ford did get three of four Eastern squads, going wrong only in underestimating the power of a New Jersey camel toe.
Also redeeming The Ford's picks? Miami's job of understanding the voting base, Phoenix's abandonment of the spandex from some very classy tank tops, and Seattle's surprising showing, marching into the Frisky Four like a team possessed (The Ford's voting them the squad most likely to stab you with a kitchen knife in the hopes of "rekindling the passion").
Of course, just as The Ford said they would, the Heat squad destroyed Detroit's own Automotion (despite the plucky Michiganders' discovery of some ocean-front property) ruining The Ford's hopes that a local entrant in the Frisky Four would score him some press passes.
So, who's in the semis? Miami's already there, and Seattle's crushing Houston. The Ford'd put his money down -- if any bookies were taking bets -- on New York, simply because, well, the Nets' squad appears to be a one-trick pony. It's a good trick, but The Ford's seen better in certain dark rooms in Vegas.
Over in the West, it's tougher to say, but The Ford likes the chances of the Phoenix squads, if simply becuase the tank top shot gives them a very "L-Word"-esque vibe, and if there's one thing folks who vote in these things (like, say, The Ford...) like more than busty cheer babes, it's busty cheer babes with a Sapphic bend...
At least, they like them more than busty cheer babes with balls.... Tough luck, Dallas.


At 5:23 AM, March 23, 2006, Blogger Marcus said...

The Nationals are never going to move Soriano back to second base. He's a disaster at the supposedly easiest infield position — dead last in fielding percentage among 2Bs who qualify, the most errors(although he did have a lot of chances).

I also don't think he's a lesser player in left than at second. The only place that really matters is in fantasy baseball. All the Nats want to do is get his bat in the lineup and reduce the negative impact of his defense. All he's gotta do is catch fly balls and not let grounders (which are moving a lot slower than at second, and he won't have to worry about the throw) get through to the wall.

I also can't see how it would negatively affect his market value. If a team still thinks of him as a second baseman they could still put him there (It's not like he's going to get worse).

Lastly, what people are forgetting is that he was a shortstop stuck behind Derek Jeter until Chuck Knoblauch suddenly got a wicked case of Mackey Sasser-itis when throwing to first base. He's also 30 years old. If it ain't working out, it might be time to try a change of pace.

That being said, I'm glad he still qualifies as a second baseman in my league, I'd pick him up in the 2nd-4th round.

At 4:30 PM, March 23, 2006, Blogger The Ford said...

I agree his market value is unaffected. He's a decent player, regardless.
But he's WAY more valuable at 2B than in the OF. There were only five 2Bs with a higher OPS than his .821 last season; meanwhile, there were 10 LFs, and 23 total OFs with higher OPSs, including luminaries such a Jay Gibbons and Jermaine Dye, both of which are making much, much less than either Soriano or Vidro. Add in that Vidro is getting pretty rough offensively, and I think replacing him with Soriano (even with the admittedly HORRIBLE defense), if they can deal Vidro for an above OF, is a gain for the Nats. It's not as much of a gain with the Vidro/Soriano combo replacing the Vidro/Wilkerson combo from last season. But of course, part of the problem here is the Nats being dumb enough to deal Wilkerson for Soriano in the first place. That's not a swap you win, I don't think.

At 3:50 AM, March 24, 2006, Blogger Marcus said...

All I'm trying to say is you get his offense no matter what position he plays. If he's at second he still has a worse OPS than Jay Gibbons. You might as well try to reduce the damage he can do defensively. I'm not sure left field is the best place (an AL team would like him as a DH, I'd imagine).

The only reason Washington went after him is they need someone who can hit the ball out of cavernous RFK stadium. They're just trying to hide him on defense.

Now, Jose Vidro isn't the type of player a manager normally should shuffle his lineup for. In the long run, I think the Nats are doing Soriano a favor. The sooner he cuts the cord at second base, the better his career will be.


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