Thursday, August 17, 2006

"Everybody's entitled to one mistake..."

It's this saying that keeps The Ford able to be friends with some of his acquaitainces who attended The Official Rival, even though, well, choosing to go to U-Dub is like choosing to root for the Yankees, the Cowboys, John Elway and Satan, all in one fell swoop.

It's the same thought that keeps The Ford able to enjoy Lou Holtz, even though he coached at Notre Dame.

(Thus Digresses The Ford: The Ford hates Notre Dame. The Ford hates the University of Michigan. The University of Michigan hates Notre Dame. Notre Dame hates the University of Michigan. Who then, should The Ford hate -- and who should The Ford root for around Sept. 16, when the two schools meet in their yearly "Battle for the Hearts and Minds of Heartless and Mindless Midwest Football fans"? Easy answer: A bus crash. Then again, that might take out some innocent bystanders on I-94. So, The Ford will choose to root for, um, er, ah, hell, Michigan. He's already gonna burn in hell. Might as well add a few verses of "Hail to the Victors" to his stay...)

Lou Holtz returned the Irish to dominance in the 80s and 90s, and then blew it. Did the same at South Carolina, though there, at least, he managed to bring in one of The Ford's FAVORITE coaches, The Official Ol' Ballcoach, before he left.

So, obviously, Mr. Holtz is approaching redemption.

A journey that took a bit of a step back with the publishing of his new book, which features him in full Notre Dame regalia.

Then again, were Darth Vader to publish a book, you can be damn sure he'd be wearing the cape and breather, and not using some lame-ass shots of him as Anakin Skywalker.

Plus, The Ford's got to admire a quick glance at Mr. Holtz's pithy aphorisms. (Though none of them are as good as this exchange: " 'What's the difference between Notre Dame and Cheerios?' a waiter asked Lou Holtz before the 1992 Sugar Bowl: 'Cheerios belong in a bowl.' 'What's the difference between me and a golf pro?' Holtz replied: 'A golf pro gives tips.' " )

Ah, college football season. Go Cougs.

(Thus Meta-Sayeth The Ford: For what it's worth, a search online for WSU cheerleader Barbie photos is pretty damn frightening. Though it does reveal both a viral list of various Washington state Barbies, Evergreen State/Treetop Barbie and some Barbie Photoshop work. You've been warned...)


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